When asked to speak today I wasn't sure what to say other than to tell
my journey to motherhood and why this Mother's Day is special to me.
My journey has taught me a lot especially about the power of prayer
and God's plan. It all began 10 years ago when my dreams as a little
girl to grow up, get married and have children were shattered. I
thought my life was over before it had started. It seemed that at the
same time as we were told that we could not have children, everyone
around us was having children. I would cry after attending a baby
shower and Mother's Day became the most dreaded day of the year. I was
so envious and felt left out. I was told to pray and that God would
answer my prayers. So I began praying and asking for a child. He heard
my prayers and over the years has blessed me with 2 nephews and 2
nieces; so I had the honor of being an aunt. I am thankful for my
family for letting me share in their children's lives.
Still I had an ache deep in my heart for a child of my own, so I
still prayed that God would give me a child, one that was mine. We
tried a couple of times to go through the state agency to adopt, but
each time there seemed to be some obstacle that prevented us from
completing the process. I did not realize until later that these
obstacles were God's way of telling us this was not his plan. Time
went on and I continued to pray trusting that God would once again
answer my prayers and last April 2001, he blessed me with two
children, Savanah and Gage. Still they were not my own, and it was
only to be temporary, but they were living in my home. It was hard to
tend to them each day and love them without falling in love with them,
especially Gage. Savanah was older and although she loved me and
called me momma, she also loved and knew her mother and longed to be
with her. Gage on the other hand was only 4 months and knew only me
and so as the days went by, the thought of having to give him back to
his mother became harder to accept. I tried to tell myself that God
had brought him to me and should the time come to give him up God
would have something else for me. He would give me peace, which he
did.
Last August, I was given the greatest gift of all, Gage! One mother
had made the ultimate decision. She gave me the chance to be a mother.
I know this mother personally and I know at the time of her decision
God was with her. She knew it was the best thing for all involved. God
had blessed me once again. He had given me two children to love, and
finally, one of my own. So this Mother's Day, not only do I want to
thank God, I also want to thank those mothers who chose not only to
give life to a child, but chose to let that child live life with
mother's like me. During my journey God answered my prayers each time
blessing me, first as a woman, then as an aunt, and saving in my
opinion the best for last, a mother. The only thing better than being
honored here today as a mother is when Gage looks at me and calls me
"momma" because it is then that I know it is real.
